There's colors on the street, red white and blue

Oh man. The elections are upon us. I've got Jon Stewart on the live Midterm Midtacular.
Of course the talk on the tip of every tongue is that Wilson lied to protect House. Because he loves him. I'm telling you people (all, like, what-2 of you? and a grand total of zero that care) Wilson is coming out of that closet he's been residing in through 3 marriages. Mark my words.

Ha ha Katherine Harris boob joke. Hi-LAR-ious. Rick Santorum...drumroll please...Rick Santorum has been raptured...no DEFEATED!!! Yea!!!

Does anyone have any idea about the election in TN? I'm pretty sure everything I've voted for has been defeated. Because my belief system is diametrically opposed to everything held dear in this part of the country. G-d, it's hard to be a tree huggin' porn watchin' pot smokin' lazy ass hippie in the American South. Our Gov. is a Dem anyway. And the queers won't be allowed to soil the sacred heterosexual practice of marriage. Godfearin' Christians like Sara Evans are doing a good enough job of that.
Have I mentioned lately how much I dislike that santimonious bitch?
I really dislike that santimonious bitch.

My landlady pisses me off. Did I mention that? I talked to her yesterday for 10 seconds. She wanted to cut up my rosemary bush (that "funny looking eyesore thing") and plant some stupid ugly yellow flowers. I'm not a big fan of flowers. They offer nothing to the world. Mum says I should lighten up (she says that a lot-see later anecdote) that she's just a crazy old lady. I don't deny that-she is (like humans are, usually) mostly harmless. This does't stop me from being pissed off for days every time I talk to her. Jesus, she's annoying. I would do a dance of glee the day I move out of this apartment. I dream of the day that I am able to move to a place where I can sit on my back porch and drink a beer and listen to the Stones and not have to worry about someone seeing me with a drink and judging my morality. I like beer, I like rock'n'roll and I would LOVE being able to live my life without my neighbors interfering with my pastimes.

The youth of this fair city were out of school the last three days. I was ready to kill those little twerps by the end of the day today. This one kid, let's call him Kenny, because he was wearing an orange coat with the hood pulled over his head and tied under his chin, he was at my place of employ from the time we opened yesterday until we closed and turned up as soon as we unlocked the doors this morning.
I was forced to unleash my inner Sister Mary Catherine on those rotters. This one guy, an adult-well, 19 anyway--was being loud as fuck. I told him nicely to be quiet. He continued to be an idiot. So I resorted to shushing. When that didn't work I stomped across the library, stood 6 feet away from him-hand on hips, legs shoulder width apart and said "Alright, we're going to learn to use our inside voices or we're going to leave."
"You might want to find some tone that sounds less like a ruler weilding nun when you're dealing with the public."
"They don't listen to me. I have to be a bitch."
"Not too surprising the white chick doesn't put any fear in them."
The other instance wherein I tried to bring the smackdown on the kiddies...
These brothers and their friends, spend all their days in the library playing computer games. They gather 3 or 4 to a computer and yell across the room at each other. They're jackasses. They're also probably crack babies, so I give them some slack. Not a lot, bit the eenciest bit since they aren't entirely at fault for their idiocy. If nothing else the fact that their mother gave 3 of the 4 of them rhyming names makes them deserving of some pity. Why do parents think it's cute to give children corresponding names?

ANYWAY-these kids piss me off. And today they had reached the boredom threshold and I was high as a kite on DayQuil. We were all in rare form.
I was alone at the desk. It was 5 minutes since the 'inside voices' comment. The lights were melting. The brats were laughing about some picture of a scantily clad lady. There were 4 boys to one computer.
"OK. I've been nice and I've been not as nice. Now I'm just going to be blunt-either three of you get up and go find a book to read and start acting like people are supposed to act in a library or I'm cutting off the computers and you won't be able to get on the rest of the day."
Add a wagging finger to the hands on hips, Peter Pan pose and you have the image for this scene.
It was at this moment the head of the district emerged from the office. "If you would give me a pen and paper so I can take these young men's names please." She's a large woman, not fat, tall and deep voiced. Imposing. I got her that pen and paper.
She took the names of the young men and explained that she was the head of this library and all libraries in this area and would they like to explain their behavior to her since they seemed to be unable to explain it to me.
I went to lunch around that time.
During lunch I watched a BlackAdder DVD since someone had dropped it in the book drop yesterday and I've only seen that series twice. Well, thrice, now. The walls solidified again, so I took more NyQuil.

The DEMS have taken the House!
What about Ford/Corker? Please tell me Ford took the race. I'm doubting it.

"I hestitate to ask this, Stephen, what's happening in the South tonight?"
"Jon, I think we both know how that swings."
"To the right."
"Well, it is Bush country."
"Touche."

FTW

Dude, Jon got away with saying 'shit' tonight and Stephen just said we should 'give the country back to the goddamn Indians' I love live TV. That has got to be the least politically correct thing uttered last night. And Damn! It was edited out this morning.

This is your loyal reporter, signing off from her post in the Colbert Nation.

Let's get these bastards!
Let's go get 'em!

Good night America.