Karma police, I've given all I can, it's not enough

Oh pets. Allow me to share with you my day.
Today was my first experience as a children's librarian. The Irony Police are camped out on my lawn, SRSLY. I know nothing about children. I don't know a single damn game. When I was a kid (like 10-11, past story time age, anyway) my favorite game was "Act Out Cat on a Hot Tin Roof A couple years later I moved on to the much more typical "Play Edmund in Long Day's Journey Into Night.") That should give you an idea of what my childhood was like. Pre-teens quoting Tennessee Williams and Eugene O'Neil aren't normal. When I was four, I was still a fairly typical child. Other than my refusal to pretend that my ears hung low-because really, what's humorous about physical deformity? Nothing. That's what.
I am so not cut out for children's librarian-ship. Oh, I can do it-but if asked if I thought it was a good idea I'd have to go with no. Still, I'm a big fan of employment and food and shelter. So-bring on the kiddies!
One valuable lesson, should you ever run a story time: Read the long story first. I have the attention span of a gnat-by the time I got to the long story I was bored. The kids must've been miserable. And don't rely on late night viewings of Pee Wee's Playhouse for game inspiration. Turns out not too many pre-school teachers get excited about "screaming real loud" whenever someone says today's word. Great. I'm out of ideas.
The funny thing (as if it isn't all kind of funny) is that I wasn't nervous until after the kids had left. Somehing about having time to reflect on how the thing went was worse than the thing itself.
The kids were adorable. Tiny and trusting and just sweet all around. I had to help one little guy get into his coat (he was trying to put it on upside down) and they all waved bye-bye and thanked me for the story. Still, I wasn't as amusing as I should have been.
The youth of America were not entertained by my dry wit and snarkasm. A lesson learned.
Otherwise-the story is finished and you can read it here:

http://community.livejournal.com/housefic/767371.html

The ending is relatively happy. At least re: my view of life. That is to say-most of the main characters remain pretty much sane and no one else dies. But no one's spontaneously breaking out into song either. That would just be silly.


What can I say, my dear, to make it clear
I need you badly, badly, Madam Librarian...Marian
If I stumbled and I busted my what-you-may-call-it
I could lie on your floor
'Till my body had turned to carrion....Madam Librarian

Erm, what? Where was I?
Right-well, big weekend ahead. Rocky Horror on Fri AND the Guilty Pleasures are gigging that night, too. And then Sat there's that record release thing at the Wash. Also HUGH is HOSTING SNL!!!!!! Live from New York! Teh Sexxy!
As things stand I'm going as PC (as in "I'm a Mac" and "I'm a PC") for Halloween or maybe as House (as in I wear the same clothes I wear everyday but carry a cane--I wanted to get Coupland a white jacket and a pocket protector, but I've been busy) or maybe I'll do something really wild and crazy and go as a Mary Hatch in the world where George Bailey was never born (a spinster that works at a library.)
Stretches all.