People don't you know what I'm talkin about?

Second post of the day. Scroll down for actual news.



"I don't expect anyone to live up to any moral code I don't hold myself to."
"And what exactly is that code?"
"Don't be unnecessarily rude. I have no problem with rudeness, but I want to know why. Don't just be an ass for no good reason. Don't lie if it doesn't do anyone any good. Again, lying is fine. But it has to lead to some kind of positive result. Lying because it's easier than telling the truth doesn't do anyone any good. In fact, it usually has negative results. Be real. Be honest. Don't just be an obnoxious ass who thinks of no one but his or her own well being. And by real I mean, don't pretend you give a shit about other people when you don't. It's human nature. I have a lot more respect for people that admit that don't give a damn what happens to anyone but themselves than people who pretend to be concerned about the human race. It doesn't matter. We're in it for ourselves. Anyone who says otherwise is delusional."
"You're very uplifting, you know that?"
"I try."
"You're also kind of a bitch."
"Never said I wasn't."

I can forgive a lot. I am unbelievably loyal to the people I care about. (Doesn't mean they have the same values as I do, I don't expect that) I would go through hell for the people that I love. But if I write you off...You could be on fire and sitting on my living room floor...I wouldn't care what happened to you. Shit, I'd probably toss a match your direction. Just to speed things along.

I don't think that's cold. Lots of people might. But I don't.

What does this have to do with anything?
It's a conversation I had today.
I believe these things. I don't care if people believe what I do. I really don't. But I'm not going to alter how I live my life in order to make anyone else happy.

Basically, what it comes down to...I've spent a lot of time doing something I hate. Just trying to survive. It's been taxing. I've been depressed. I am probably still depressed. Despite this good news. I've developed some bad habits. Unhealthy habits. Nothing I'm proud of...but if you cornered me and asked...I wouldn't deny them.

I don't want to keep living like this.

I want out.