They tell me depression runs in the family...That doesn't help me much

There's just something I need to get off my chest.
If someone is depressed and feels that life fucking sucks the last thing that person needs to hear is about people that have it worse. I think you know I'm speaking from experience.
Don't tell me about the girl that used to live in the neighborhood with the drug habit. It's not going to have the desired effect. I know I should feel bad for her and in my logical mind I do. But my selfish, distorted miserable view of the world I'm jealous. I wish I could drown out the way I feel. And drug addicts get forgiven. They get to move on.
Don't tell me about that guy you went to church with that died of cancer. Or the horrible way some loved one died. Don't tell me how strong you've been and that G-d never gives us more than we can handle. And for the love of all that is don't tell me I could be a homeless or unemployed or living in a war torn country.
Does no one understand that saying those things doesn't help? It doesn't put things into perspective. It just reminds me of what a worthless cunt I am. I know that. I don't need a reminder. It's pretty much the only thing I think about all day long.
That's why I am the way I am. Because I'm a terrible person. Thanks for really driving that point home.