This is not a cry for help. Cries for help look like this--"Another day, everything is the same. Very bored. Kind of lonely. You know ,the usual."

This is going to sound really melodramatic. But I'm not trying for attention. I've been far more melodramatic at times and with no more or less provocation. I just have this need to write this out.Somewhere where it won't go away unless I disappear it. Because if I'm wrong I can reference it later to prove that I don't know what I'm talking about. If I'm right then I'll know when the warning really kicked up. It seems like something that might be good to know.
There is something wrong. My chest hurts. My heart has been pounding in my chest. But my heart rate is normal. My back hurts-a lot. I've spent much of the day trying to fight off the urge to scream. At one point I just started shaking. I thought I was going to cry. But I didn't. I don't know how else to describe it. I feel completely out of control. Yet, I'm in control. No one seems to see anything abnormal. But I know-I can tell. I can feel it and I am scared.
I thought about trying to get into see a doctor. Same song, of course. I know what's wrong with me and the treatment is worse than the symptoms. Right? That's what I keep telling myself. Right now--I'm not sure. Three and a half hours to go before I can go home. Three and a half hours.
I'll be fine. Of course, I'll be fine. Nothing else to be.
It's just PMS.
It's the season.
It's nothing.
I'm imagining it.
That's all.