On my way over heretonight I heard a song that perfectly personfied my emotions...

Everybody have fun tonight
Everybody Wang Chung tonight.
-Best.Frasier.Quote.Ever.

Now, I'm not exactly in the middle of a prolonged Wang Chung or anything here, but I am enjoying cautious positive emotions that could be construed as happiness. But, I find that being happy is a very treachorous emotion and I try to save it for moments that I know will disappear quickly, as oppose to lengthy periods of time. I would call my state of mind-slightly less negative than usual. That's an apt description.

The head of the division of libraries I've been working at called me, "A good little worker." This is after she walked up on me idly reading a book by Richard Roeper on urban legends. (At least she didn't catch me reading fan fiction, tho she might not have cared.) She's obviously fallen for my unavoidable charms. Or was won over by the fact that I was willing to tackle the YA section-an area that looked like no one had tried to organize it since the earliest months of the 21st century. She says she wants me working full time ASAP.

I refuse to accept that this is for real. That would be hope, wouldn't it? That's just not me.

But for a moment I let my guard down, and I believed it. When no one was looking, I let myself dream about the possibility of earning a living wage and being able to pay my car insurance and buy groceries. It was a pretty dream, but like that one where I'm onstage at Starwood performing a duet of "Stop Dragging My Heart Around" with Tom Petty, I know it's just a fantasy.

Sometimes a fantasy is all you need.